I AM BIOLOGICALLY CHILDLESS.

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Comments

[nausicaa]

I agree completely!

[brendas]

Its brave to put a face and your voice on your blog. Thank you for saying it, I deal with this everyday and I can't tell these emotions to my friends. You make me want to try.

[Serena Tomlin]

I'm 36 years young and me and my sister were never able to conceive a child I guess it wasn't meant to be for eiter one of us. I feel a big empty spot in my heart my mind and the pit of my stomache each and everyday and it's hard being around other people and their children. I do however have 2 pitbulls that I baby just a little bit 2 much @ times! I'm just looking for any comforting words sent my way because nobody I knows exactly what I'm going through. You can also email me if anyone just wants to talk Thanks. Serena Tomlin serenaserena@hotmail.com

[magdalen - tiffany]

howdy serena, i'm sorry you're going through this.

i've been circling around the Empty Spot and how it affects my emotions, my life, my spirituality -- everything. it's been interesting, i have to admit. there is more to the whole process than grief.

but first comes the grief. loads and loads and loads of it, in a society that DOES NOT UNDERSTAND what you're going through.

so ummm, i understand in my way, and i'm sending all the empathy and sympathy i can.

i do "selective avoidance" by the way, it might help you: it's basically a technique of keeping child situations away from you for a while. in my case, babies and very-young children trigger grief, emotions, and hormones. i mostly avoid them. when i get email that a couple is pregnant, i congratulate them and then say that while i would like to know when the child is born and what its name is, i am "dealing with the biological clock" and "can't" receive sonograms, photos, or updates about the specifics of pregnancy, birth, etc.

things have gotten better for me. i can shop for groceries during normal hours without all the zillions of babies making me cry (they tend to just annoy me, now, or at least the screeching cries do). i visit the little ones in my friends' lives every so often. but no baby showers, etc. no point in torturing ourselves! as time wears on, most of us will come to terms with being biologically childless, and we may be able to have small children and babies in our lives. but for me, first i need to let time wear on...